The question is - are your prepared for the answer?

Someone, I can't quite remember who - though there are several suspects - once remarked to me

'If you don't want the answer, don't ask the question'

And years later it still strikes me as pretty sound advice.

And advice that could be made even better by making it

'If you don't want to deal with the answer, don't ask the question.'

This has really been brought home to me recently by some lacklustre customer service.

'Did you,' asked the man on duty at a hotel reception desk recently, 'enjoy your stay, madam?'
' The bed was very comfortable and the room was fine, 'I said - before continuing - without pause and in the same, even, tone 'but I was very disappointed both by the lack of provision for vegetarians on the menu and of chef's reaction when I asked him what might be possible'.

The man suddenly seemed to have a very interesting message written on his shoes that mean he felt the need to study them intently. I think it said ' say nothing and she might go away'. Because that's what he - and I, did. And I won't be back!

Sadly, this is but one of several examples in recent days.

But it applies in other areas of life, too.

I happened to mention to someone that I offered hypnotherapy and she said 'oh, could you help me stop smoking?' I agreed that indeed I could and would be happy to help. When I followed up, however#, she realised that she didn't really want to give up smoking - which is to say, she wasn't yet ready to deal with the answer to her question. And that's fine - at least she realised before we got stuck in and she'd invested time, energy and money on something she doesn't currently want.

Questions - as my series of articles in my newsletter is exploring - are powerful communication tools. Just so long as you're prepared for the answer!